Many couples make the decision to separate before Christmas, but stay together to avoid ruining the festivities.
Alison Gaddes, family law solicitor at Wake Smith, says once the Christmas tree has been taken down, many couples set about the process of officially dismantling their marriages.
Here she looks at the essential points to consider when separating.
The roof over your head
The first issue to consider is where you will live and how will you afford to pay for your home. If you are renting, contact your landlord and explain your personal circumstances to see if you can transfer the tenancy agreement into your sole name. If the tenancy agreement is already in your sole name then you do not have an issue. If the tenancy agreement is in your partner’s name and you intend to continue living in the property, then you may need to enter into a new tenancy agreement. Before you enter into a new agreement, consider whether you can afford to maintain the monthly rent shorthold tenancy agreement last for at least 6 months so make sure you can afford to meet the rental payment.
If you have a mortgage on your home, decide how your monthly payments are going to be maintained. Will you be able to afford the payments yourself or will your former partner need to help, and if so by how much and for how long? It’s important the mortgage doesn’t fall into arrears. If this is going to be an issue, contact your mortgage provider sooner rather than later and get some advice or get in touch with a debt charity who will be able to provide you with some independent debt advice.
Are you entitled to any benefits, exemptions or reductions?
All local councils offer a sole occupancy council tax reduction on your council tax, usually 25%. Contact your local council immediately to ensure you get your council tax reduction as early as possible.
You may be entitled to Tax Credits when you separate, even if you were not entitled when living as a couple.
You may be entitled to claim Child Benefit, if you are not in receipt of the child benefit but you are the primary carer for a child. This applies even if you weren’t entitled when you lived together. Contact the Department of Work and Pensions for further information.
Short out the household bills
Whether you are staying in the home or moving out, it’s a good idea to get meter readings and final bills for your utilities, TV licence, SKY and telephone and change over the bills to the occupier.
Contact your bank and sort out your joint accounts
If you have a joint account with your partner, then you need to be aware you are jointly and severally liable. This means if you have money in a joint account, the other person can withdraw any amount of funds from that account. If you have considerable savings, then you should consider withdrawing your share of the savings from that account into your sole name. Alternatively, you could ask the bank to change the account security so that you both need to jointly sign or ask for the account to be frozen.
If your joint account is your current account, where all your direct debits are withdrawn, ensure you transfer those debits associated with your partner to their own account and only maintain those your need to take responsibility.
If your joint account is in its overdraft and you are unable to put the account in credit. Then consider freezing the account and transferring over the direct debits, or lowering the overdraft just to cover your overheads.
It is always helpful if you can retain a copy of your bank statements from the time you separated. This information can sometimes be important in confirming the amount of savings or liability at the time you separated.
Change your postal address and redirect your mail
If you are the one moving address, it’s wise to change your postal address with your bank, credit card, pension and other providers. You can use the post office’s redirection service until you have informed all providers.
Change your security passwords and take important and sensitive paperwork with you
Once you separate, change all online pins and passwords for your banking, email accounts and social media accounts like Facebook and Twitter. It is not unusual for former partners to spy on one another, so keep things private.
Take important personal documents with you or items which may not be valuable, but are personally sentimental. If the document relates to an account or policy in joint names, then take a copy.
Inform the children’s schools, childminders, doctors and dentist that you are separating
It is always important to let the children’s school and child carers know what has been agreed between the parents. You should also inform your GP and dentist about changes.
Let your employer know
Sometimes it can be hard to let your employer know when there are problems at home. However, letting them know what is happening, will make it easier if you have to arrange time off with work to visit your solicitor or attend court appointments.
Make a Will and change your nominate beneficiaries
If you have assets which you wish to protect, then it is important to consider making a Will. The law when you pass away can be complicated, and so it is always best to get clear advice from a solicitor about your rights.
If you have a pension or life insurance policy you may want to discuss who would benefit from the policy in the event of your death and change your nominated beneficiary.
Give yourself some time
The breakdown of a relationship is one of the hardest emotional stresses you have to recover from. The grief of a relationship breakdown can sometime feel overwhelming. Try not to be hard on yourself, give yourself time, and speak with close friends or family who will offer you support and good counselling. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to friends and family there are specialist counsellors who can help you through this difficult time.
For further advice about separating contact our Family team who will be happy to provide you with further in-depth advice.
